it's a man's world...(apparently)

on july 3rd, 1986 just after midnight, ruth elizabeth peterson haynie had just closed the back cover of ernest hemingway's "immovable feast." then her water broke. less than an hour later, the world had me. i think the obsession began then. or maybe it started in the eight grade on my "american heritage" tour of the east coast, when one night my hotel mates and i discovered "in love and war", starring chris o'donnel (be still my soul), and wept profusely when agnes never went back to michigan. probably not as much as he did. either way, i have an insane fascination/obsession with ernest hemingway. he was a man's man, yet he had a house full of cats. a soldier, expatriate, yet a lover of words and several women. this little city girl's perfect soulmate on paper, but he's not here anymore. either way, based on my recent dating ventures at byu, it's apparent that there was shrapnel on Heaven's floor on july 21, 1899 when the world had him, too. i feel like i have been dating a string of women since returning home. if they aren't telling me that i am dressed a little "shabby" for a quick run to the grocery store on a saturday night, they are correcting me on some recent celebrity gossip. this madness has got to stop! whatever happened to the throaty, dark, mountain lodge-y types of the 1900s? gone, gone with the wind. it seems almost an epidemic in utah valley culture to breed hypersensitive, pastel-appreciating, media snobs who can wield a left foot with as much gusto as a spatula. i can maybe whip something up in the microwave or on a george foreman. maybe. i guess the reason this discomforts me so much is because i am not a "girl's girl." never have been. sure, i like to dress up, smell nice, swoon when i see bale, and i want my butt to look stellar in my sevens, but i would take a mariner's game over a bridal shower, kelly clarkson concert or shopping spree almost anyday. cereal. pink has never been a favorite, and it never will be. i am very intouch with my feminine side, don't get me wrong, but there is something so freeing about waking up, contemplating not showering for the day, lounging around in the pjs and eating bowl after bowl of frosted mini wheats. this may suprise some of my readers, as i have been told recently that my image does not give off this vibe. being pink (or really a deep, purple in my case) needs to have a balance. and someday, i will.